This one may get a little scattered so try to keep up. I have a lot on my mind today. I started the diet today, it actually went better than I expected so I felt good about that. The resolution to stop living in the past has not gone so well today though. For some reason it has been a down kind of day, which always leads me to start thinking back over things so I thought maybe if I write about it it will go away...or at least get better.
I am going to discuss relationships for a while. I personally have really started to lose faith in them. I have been lied to, cheated on, hurt, used and that is just the beginning. It seems that everyone comes with their own brand of tricks. A little piece of advice, if someone says "I will never hurt you" RUN, because brother someone is going to get hurt and it isn't them! If you feel like someone is not telling you the whole truth, chances are they're not! If you hear the words "Its not what you think" or "Its not what it looks like" Believe me it is EXACTLY what you think/it looks like!! And then lastly, if you here the words "Its not you, its me" This is a true statement, but not for the reason the person uttering it thinks. It is true because it is them...THAT WANTS OUT and they are telling you that not to make it easier on you (although they think it is) but to actually make it easier on them. I don't think there is one honest person left in this world who is single. All the honest/decent ones are married or dating someone. So I have taken a sabbatical from the world of relationships.
Now on to something else. One of my long-time co-workers and friends had her last day today. I have worked with her for 8 years. We have sat side by side that whole time, except for a couple of years when they moved me into another office. She will be missed. She kept me laughing and showed me so much. It was hard to see her go. I do not know how we will fill this empty spot in our office. She has, however, moved on to bigger and better things and she is finally pursuing her dream (I am still chasing my dream).
On a sad note, a very dear friend of mine lost her mother yesterday and I feel for her so much. She is a sweet, wonderful person and I know she is going through a very rough time. My thoughts and prayers are with her tonight.
Still reading the same book, although I picked up a new mystery over the weekend, I will have to share more about it once I start it.
I would now like to talk about something that is very near and dear to me. There are many people who suffer from some form of Bi-Polar disorder (Manic Depression). It is a horrible disorder that when left untreated can wreak havoc on your life and those around you. I try to mention this as often as I can as it is a cause I support wholeheartedly. If you know someone with this or you have it, you know exactly where I am coming from. It colors your whole way of thinking, acting, functioning etc. It is not that those who suffer from it are lazy, crazy, useless, or can snap out of it at will. It is a disease exactly like someone with diabetes or epilepsy. No one would dare tell these people to snap out of it or to get over themselves, but people with mental disorders are expected to do that on a daily basis. Please, if you know someone with BPD or any mental problem for that matter be kind and understanding to them, they are usually doing their best. Now if they refuse to see someone about it or take their medication, by all means slap them, hog-tie them and get them to their doctor! I am kidding, please don't do that, but you should urge them to do those things if at all possible.
Now on a funnier note, I was driving home on Thursday and I noticed a Christmas tree someone was obviously taking to the dump, right in the middle of Fernwood-Glendale road right in front of Jesse Boyd Elem. and at first I thought "Well that is odd" then I thought, "What idiot left that there? You have to realize when something that big flies out of your car!!" and then I want to know who took the time to stop, get out of their car and push it ever so neatly to the median??? Who are these people and where do they come from??
Anyway, I have rambled enough for tonight. Hope everyone makes it through the first week back at work!
Monday, January 3, 2011
Saturday, January 1, 2011
New Year's Day Thoughts
Well the new year is here. I am feeling somewhat excited about some of the plans I have made. I also am inspired. You see I LOVE rainy days and I have taken it as a very good sign that today has been very rainy. Good things happen on rainy days!
I had my peas and collards today. My Grandmother was gracious enough to invite me to dinner, they were, as always, delicious. While I was eating them I couldn't help but think about how many times I have sat in that same place and eaten that same meal. It made me think how very important tradition is. This is a southern tradition that I have grown up around and it has been as certain as the sunrise in the morning. It made me think how time is wearing away at so many of our tradtions. I admire the British for their dedication to time honored traditions. We, as Americans seem to think if it is old, antiquated or seems to have no real purpose it should be thrown away. The South was one place where traditions ran very deep and we have resisted a lot of the American way of discarding the seemingly outmoded, but we too have started to fall under the magical spell of the new and temporary. Traditions are things that must be kept in place in my humble opinion. They are what weaves the fabric that make each of us who we are. It shapes and at the same time gives us our identity as a culture. Too many things have fallen by the wayside already, so hang on tight to your traditions. If you don't currently have a tradition in your family, start one and stay true to it each year, you and your children will be glad you did.
As far as my reading, I am still working my way through the book I told you all about yesterday and it just keeps getting better! I am not feeling much like reading today though. It feels more like a movie day. I am in the mood to see one of my new old favorites today...'Summertime' with Katherine Hepburn. This is a movie that is a classic (1950s) and I only discovered it last spring and had to buy it right away (Got it on Amazon for next to nothing). I love the so-called Golden age of Hollywood. This movie really spoke to me for some reason. I don't know if it was because it takes place in Venice, or because I can identify so well with Ms. Hepburn's character in the film, or if it is just because it was a good movie to watch, whatever the reason I highly recommend it.
Hope you are all having a wonderful New Year's Day and remember to go out of your way to do at least one kindness for someone!
I had my peas and collards today. My Grandmother was gracious enough to invite me to dinner, they were, as always, delicious. While I was eating them I couldn't help but think about how many times I have sat in that same place and eaten that same meal. It made me think how very important tradition is. This is a southern tradition that I have grown up around and it has been as certain as the sunrise in the morning. It made me think how time is wearing away at so many of our tradtions. I admire the British for their dedication to time honored traditions. We, as Americans seem to think if it is old, antiquated or seems to have no real purpose it should be thrown away. The South was one place where traditions ran very deep and we have resisted a lot of the American way of discarding the seemingly outmoded, but we too have started to fall under the magical spell of the new and temporary. Traditions are things that must be kept in place in my humble opinion. They are what weaves the fabric that make each of us who we are. It shapes and at the same time gives us our identity as a culture. Too many things have fallen by the wayside already, so hang on tight to your traditions. If you don't currently have a tradition in your family, start one and stay true to it each year, you and your children will be glad you did.
As far as my reading, I am still working my way through the book I told you all about yesterday and it just keeps getting better! I am not feeling much like reading today though. It feels more like a movie day. I am in the mood to see one of my new old favorites today...'Summertime' with Katherine Hepburn. This is a movie that is a classic (1950s) and I only discovered it last spring and had to buy it right away (Got it on Amazon for next to nothing). I love the so-called Golden age of Hollywood. This movie really spoke to me for some reason. I don't know if it was because it takes place in Venice, or because I can identify so well with Ms. Hepburn's character in the film, or if it is just because it was a good movie to watch, whatever the reason I highly recommend it.
Hope you are all having a wonderful New Year's Day and remember to go out of your way to do at least one kindness for someone!
Friday, December 31, 2010
My initial post and New Year thoughts
Well, this is my first post. I am reflecting back over the past year and there have been some very, very rough patches but with a lot of great moments thrown in. I feel like I have really grown this past year and I hope to continue to do so in the year to come. This blog is something I have been wanting to do for some time now and I have finally taken the time to sit down and do it. In this blog you will learn A LOT about me, my opinions, my likes, my dislikes, my concerns, books I am ready, television shows, movies, and just about everything else you may or may not have wanted to know! I hope it is entertaining, enlightening, and that maybe something I say will make a difference to someone out there! So, here it goes (you knew it was coming) My New Year rant (I know it is a bit of a cliche but this is just the way I am feeling right now).
In the coming year I am FINALLY going to lose some weight. I am tired of the way I look, tired of clothes not fitting right and just plain need to! I am going to cut loose a LOT of baggage this year, if I don't need it, it's as good as gone. I am going to choose friends more wisely and be a better friend to them. I am extremely tired of people who say they are your friend and they really aren't. I am going to stop living in the past so much and move towards the future, I think a line in Gone With the Wind said it best "Don't look back, it will drag at your heart until that's all you can do is look back" (I paraphrased but you get the idea).
I am going to deepen my spiritual life more. Any of you who know me know that I have have gone from one church to the next, never satisfied. Many people think this is nuts, but I feel I am on a journey and I am trying to find the 'right' path for me. I thought I had found it a few years ago, and I really have about narrowed it down to two choices, but neither of them make me completely happy. I really don't know if that is the point though, to be happy (don't worry I'm not going to go all philosophical or anything just thinking out loud...or on paper I guess, well not paper...oh you know what I mean). I love the beauty and pagentry of the Episcopal Church, but I am not at all happy with their views and beliefs, while my spiritual side is completely filled by the Catholic Church (I converted in 2008 but have fallen away). I find the Episcopal Church to be like a beautiful cake, gorgeous to look at, delicious to eat but empty calories and not good for you, while on the other hand the Catholic Church is like Brussel Sprouts, not really pretty, and not overly delicious but you know they are good for you and are full of things you need and you feel SO much better about yourself for having eaten them (There I go with food references, and I am going to lose weight..hmm).
I am reading a wonderful book right now that is helping me along my journey it is called Light of the World. It is a very in-depth interview with Pope Benedict XVI and it asks some very interesting and tough questions of him. I am inspired by it. I am also in the process of reading the Bible all the way through (something I have never done). I was brought up Southern Baptist and had Bible verses drilled into my head but I never have taken the time to read the Bible through. I am taking it a little at a time and so far I am finding it very enjoyable and enlightening.
I want to do some kind of charity work this coming year as well. There are so many who are hungry, hurting, homeless and broken right here in our own back yard. I do not knock people who go half way round the world to be missionaries but I have always been baffled that these same people will pay a fortune to go to Timbuktu to build a school for people but will not give a second at the local soup kitchen, homeless shelter or children's charity. Charity begins AT HOME so the saying goes! I am looking into something that both me and my son can possibly do together as I am trying very hard to instill this love of neighbor in him as well.
I could go on for days writing this but I am going to tie this portion up for now. I hope you all enjoy this and if you have any suggestions, questions, comments (make them nice or at least constructive) please feel free to let me know. Happy New Year everyone and PLEASE be careful and DO NOT DRIVE IF YOU HAVE BEEN DRINKING!!
In the coming year I am FINALLY going to lose some weight. I am tired of the way I look, tired of clothes not fitting right and just plain need to! I am going to cut loose a LOT of baggage this year, if I don't need it, it's as good as gone. I am going to choose friends more wisely and be a better friend to them. I am extremely tired of people who say they are your friend and they really aren't. I am going to stop living in the past so much and move towards the future, I think a line in Gone With the Wind said it best "Don't look back, it will drag at your heart until that's all you can do is look back" (I paraphrased but you get the idea).
I am going to deepen my spiritual life more. Any of you who know me know that I have have gone from one church to the next, never satisfied. Many people think this is nuts, but I feel I am on a journey and I am trying to find the 'right' path for me. I thought I had found it a few years ago, and I really have about narrowed it down to two choices, but neither of them make me completely happy. I really don't know if that is the point though, to be happy (don't worry I'm not going to go all philosophical or anything just thinking out loud...or on paper I guess, well not paper...oh you know what I mean). I love the beauty and pagentry of the Episcopal Church, but I am not at all happy with their views and beliefs, while my spiritual side is completely filled by the Catholic Church (I converted in 2008 but have fallen away). I find the Episcopal Church to be like a beautiful cake, gorgeous to look at, delicious to eat but empty calories and not good for you, while on the other hand the Catholic Church is like Brussel Sprouts, not really pretty, and not overly delicious but you know they are good for you and are full of things you need and you feel SO much better about yourself for having eaten them (There I go with food references, and I am going to lose weight..hmm).
I am reading a wonderful book right now that is helping me along my journey it is called Light of the World. It is a very in-depth interview with Pope Benedict XVI and it asks some very interesting and tough questions of him. I am inspired by it. I am also in the process of reading the Bible all the way through (something I have never done). I was brought up Southern Baptist and had Bible verses drilled into my head but I never have taken the time to read the Bible through. I am taking it a little at a time and so far I am finding it very enjoyable and enlightening.
I want to do some kind of charity work this coming year as well. There are so many who are hungry, hurting, homeless and broken right here in our own back yard. I do not knock people who go half way round the world to be missionaries but I have always been baffled that these same people will pay a fortune to go to Timbuktu to build a school for people but will not give a second at the local soup kitchen, homeless shelter or children's charity. Charity begins AT HOME so the saying goes! I am looking into something that both me and my son can possibly do together as I am trying very hard to instill this love of neighbor in him as well.
I could go on for days writing this but I am going to tie this portion up for now. I hope you all enjoy this and if you have any suggestions, questions, comments (make them nice or at least constructive) please feel free to let me know. Happy New Year everyone and PLEASE be careful and DO NOT DRIVE IF YOU HAVE BEEN DRINKING!!
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